From Chaos to Chapter One

When people ask me how Built for Belonging came into the world, I usually laugh before I answer. Not because it was funny, but because the whole process was chaos. Beautiful chaos. Painful chaos. The kind of chaos that leaves you with ash in your lungs and ink on your hands.

I didn’t set out to write a book. Not really.

It started in August 2023, when I left a three-week hospital stay more fragile than I’d ever been. I was still shaky, still figuring out if I even wanted to exist in the world. While I was admitted, my now-partner (though at the time just my best friend), Lila, asked me a question that cut straight to the bone:

“What do you want to do before you die?”

And without any hesitation, I said: publish a book.

That was the seed.

I threw myself into the project the way I throw myself into most things, with a kind of reckless devotion only mania can fuel. I wrote entire chapters in a single night, ideas bursting out of me faster than I could capture them.

The first draft was mostly fact. The skeleton of my story laid bare. But it lacked a pulse. It lacked the vulnerability that makes a book worth reading. Still, I kept writing, kept riding the whirlwind.

By April 2024, the first draft was done. Finished. Raw. Messy. And very much a product of nights spent sleepless, words pouring out of a brain on fire.

Around that time, I went to a “How to Write a Book” workshop with Lila and some business colleagues. Honestly? It was… strange. The sessions themselves weren’t particularly useful. But the in-between moments? The breaks, the conversations with people over coffee? They sparked something in me. Sometimes inspiration comes from the edges, not the centre.

After that, I gave copies of my draft to two people: a close friend (and employee) and Lila. Then I did nothing. For months. Nearly a year, actually.

The draft sat there like a ghost, haunting me every time I thought about it.

By January 2025, I decided enough was enough. My overarching goal for the year was clear: I was going to publish Built for Belonging. Back then it even had another name - Disability | Vulnerability | Adaptability. But the heart of it was the same.

That’s when Richard came into the picture. Richard was… is my editor. The person who took my storm of words and helped me find the centre.

Working with Richard changed everything. He pushed me. He asked questions I didn’t want to answer but needed to. He took what was a factual account of my story and urged me to dig deeper, to make it a memoir, to bleed on the page.

For hours and hours… and hours… I wrote. Most of it manic, again. I tore the book apart and put it back together. I cried through edits, laughed at things I’d forgotten I wrote, and sometimes shut the laptop and walked away, terrified of my own truth.

But Richard held the thread. He kept me moving forward, word by word, chapter by chapter.

By April 2025, the second — and final — draft was done. This time, the book had a heartbeat.

Of course, writing is only half the battle. After finished, I had to save funds to format, publish, and print. That waiting felt endless, like holding my breath under water. But I knew it was worth it.

Because this wasn’t just a book anymore. It was a piece of me

Looking back, Built for Belonging was born from chaos: manic nights, hospital beds, a strange workshop, endless edits, and the unwavering presence of people who believed in me when I couldn’t.

It’s not a clean story of inspiration. It’s a messy one. But that’s what makes it real.

And now, it’s here.

If you’ve ever felt broken, out of place, or on fire from the inside out… this book is for you!

You can buy your copy of Built for Belonging here or you can get it as an e-book.